The Gathering Place
The true story of when Emma learns her birth mother wrote and signed a letter about her to the adoption agency, she knew she had to have that letter if she were to ever discover her birth mother’s true identity. Her birth mother had used a fictitious name at the maternity home and used an assumed name on Emma’s original birth certificate. Emma takes bold measures to get ahold of that letter and start solving the puzzle that is her life.
Emma was adopted into a family that expected her to conform to their expectations of who she should be — but she did not arrive as a blank slate. Unable to see that her relinquishment and adoption were not her fault, her soul split into pieces. In order to put the pieces back together, Emma embarks on multiple journeys and adventures towards both solving the mystery of who she is, and healing from the pain of separation from her origins.
Emma powerfully describes a childhood and life profoundly affected by not knowing her true self. Has she ever known her true self?
It’s a story of inner strength and perseverance where Emma welcomes all her parts of self to feel valued and seen. She fights to reunite her fractured soul through love and acceptance of herself, and of others. In a meditative and surreal state, under and around a big old oak tree with a simple wood-seated and rope swing attached, she accepts the invitation of integrating herself. And this reunion all takes place at The Gathering Place.
A Fire Is Coming
The true story of when Emma Stevens learned her new next-door neighbor was a psychologist, she innocently asked about how to find a therapist for her own issues. Dr. Carol Brenner decided to accept her as a patient. Against a backdrop of the Laguna Beach Fire, the insidious drama unfolds as Emma finds herself enmeshed in an unhealthy dependency on her therapist, who not only fostered this dependence but also used it to dominate and control her.
How could this happen? Emma explores how having been relinquished at birth, put up for adoption, and raised by parents who did not treat her well, may have created the fertile ground for an experienced predator-super-therapist to exploit and indoctrinate her.
A Fire is Coming is a page-turning psychological nightmare, as Emma tries to escape the predators and narcissists in her life—who have their own egoic plan. Not only does Emma escape, she takes a hard look back at how and why it happened. Emma’s unflinching narrative serves as a cautionary tale to anyone who might find themselves a potential victim of an exploitative therapist or vindication for anyone who has had an adverse experience with an unethical professional.
After escaping such a bewildering experience, Emma dives into the field of psychology, learning about adverse personalities and the power of a cultic relationship. Emma may have started her journey as a passive victim, but as she begins to integrate her experience, she becomes a brave witness and advocate for others who may find themselves on a similar path.®
Exclusive Excerpt from Upcoming Book “Choosing To Breathe”
“What’s your name?” I tried enunciating loudly to be heard over the strong valley breeze.
She stared at me blankly, then cocked her head sideways. And even though her hair was suddenly blown across her cheeks, I was able to see the unmistakable crooked smile forming across her face.
With a gleam in her eye and a quick tuck of her light brown hair behind her ears, she playfully said, “Who do you think I am, Emma?”
I paused. Considered. And then brightened as if a light inside my head illuminated. My senses started taking in her energy. Everything about her seemed cat-like. Inquisitive. Adventurous. And a little untamed.
As if giving me grace to be lost in thought, she turned her attention to practically levitating into the rope-and-wood swing attached to the big old oak tree at The Gathering Place. With quick precision and athletic ability, she began the art of swinging to and fro.
“I like to say that I’m the one who “saved” you. I’ve always been around, but I’m also the one who’s been silenced since practically the beginning.”
The color of her eyes shone with depth and clarity. Mystery and intrigue. One moment bluish, the next, hazel green. The marbling effect mixed with the light could make them change shades in an instant. But constant was the intensity of her gaze. A gaze as glittery as a shiny ornament.
“I do remember you. But if I recall, it was sort of a mixed bag with you always demanding to be in charge!” My thoughts drifted to memories of being a child who was an explorer at heart, then of being a risk taker, and then of following this part of me all the way to dangerous, unsafe territory. I stood motionless as I watched her pumping her legs in unison and she swung higher and higher.
The one who looked so much like me, but I’d mostly forgotten, gave a quick glance over her shoulder saying, “I’m Athena!” Her voice slightly wavered as she swung with great enthusiasm. “The one who kept us moving forward by urging us to open doors and discover new things. Well … at least until our parents scared you so bad you had to, for all intents and purposes, put us in the shadows with a lot of the others. But I get it. I mean, I get why you felt you had to do that. Your safety depended upon it, for Pete’s sake!”
I went inside my head and instantaneously retrieved memory after memory sparked by Athena’s words. Had I always known this? That after being relinquished, put into foster care, adopted, and then left to survive an abusive, chaotic adoptive family, that I had had good reasons to put certain parts of me out of sight? To only allow these personas to exist behind the scenes. Those who might place my survival in jeopardy. It felt true. The more I reflected on the thought that to survive my childhood home, where my adoptive family demanded that I be the person they thought they needed me to be, my thoughts began getting crystal clear on how I had to adapt to survive. It suddenly became apparent how these adaptations, which effectively cut me off from my true developing self, kept me safe, or at least “safer,” during my youth. But what were these modifications, or self-divisions, bringing me now as an adult? I started visualizing a recent photograph of me where I’m smiling, looking so happy, but now imagining a more accurate image of myself without an eye. Maybe even missing my mouth; an arm; or any feet so I could run. All of these being the adaptation I had to become in order to survive.
“Emma,” Athena was suddenly right in front of me. She’d jumped from the swing, landing as agile as a cat.
“I am your Creativity! I am your curiosity! Your fuel to keep you desiring to explore. I’m not only your belly when you take in a breath, I’m also your backside that holds the tension for you to slowly exhale. To breathe is to explore. To explore is to be alive. This is the fuel that propels you forward. But Emma, I’m also the one our adoptive parents tried to eradicate. I’m the one they banned you from being. So, they convinced you … manipulated you … to kill me.”
Book Awards
Emma was named as an Independent Author Award winner in Tucson’s 2024 Festival of Books. Her second book, A Fire is Coming, was just named as a Finalist in the 18th Annual National Indie Excellence Awards.
